I had this random, evening thought tonight. The kind of thought where you’re mentally and physically exhausted from the demands of the day…er, week. But I have come to the realization that I’m passion about A LOT of things. I’m passionate about my faith and the sweet child I have been blessed with. I’m passionate about makeup and fashion. I’m passionate about my family and my animals. I’m passionate about my husband and our marriage. I’m passionate about my goals and dreams in life and what I wish to accomplish. And all this passionate thinking got me to wondering…am I overly passionate? What about you?
What are you passionate about? And can one truly be overly passionate?
I know you didn’t know me and I certainly didn’t know you. I was walking into Walmart to buy a few items that we had forgotten from the store the weekend before. I was 8 months pregnant, and rather large, and I was not at all excited about going into this dreaded grocery store. You had dark hair, and you were dressed nicely and I distinctly remember that you kept looking back at me. I was just waiting for the comment that I heard all too often about how big I was or that I must be due any minute. Instead, you did something that I never would have expected. You were carrying a Walmart grocery bag full of items that I had assumed were some things you needed to return. You turned to me and asked me if I was having a boy or girl. I politely smiled at you and said “a little boy.” That’s when you handed the grocery bag to me and said, “I don’t know if you need these things or need anything at all…but I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me and tell me to give you these baby items that I will not use.” I was speechless, and overjoyed at the same time. I don’t think you truly know how much you made my day by your kind words and actions. I took the bag, thanked you repeatedly, purchased my items and went home. When I got home I opened the bag to find many baby boy clothes with tags still attached, a Winnie the Pooh brush and rattle, bibs, pacifiers, towels, and a blanket. It was beyond anything I could have ever expected. I felt compelled to write this last night when I realized just how much my little boy loves his rattle you gave him and the fact that we never thought to buy a baby hairbrush but because of you, we now have one. I just wanted to say thank you. I will never forget this day because it was very special to me. It might seem small to others, but it really touched me. Above all, I saw God that day. I saw his grace and his unfailing love in you. I saw his mercy extend to even the weak and very tired pregnant woman (me). There are no words for that kind of Holy experience.
This is so perfect and so true, especially of myself.
Tonight I met with a woman for the first time who is from my church at a local coffee shop. We had spoken over the phone once before but that was it. I arrived early and I had my 4 month old with me so I decided to go ahead and order a coffee. While I am waiting, I’m holding my son and wondering what this lady might look like. (We didn’t exactly tell each other what to look out for and there were people coming in and out of the coffee shop) And finally, she arrived and we exchanged hugs and I could just feel the Lords presence. This woman was a Godly woman and she was so
Tonight, as I sit in a warm bath and think about the day…I have such a thankful heart for the opportunity to be a mother. I am thankful that my little man is on a schedule so I am able to take this bath while he sleeps. I am thankful that I am blessed with such a sweet boy who continues to light up my world everyday. I am overall mostly grateful just for him in himself. I am reminded every day that I hold him what a blessing he is. I remember all too well when I found out at 9 weeks during my first pregnancy that my baby had passed. That there was no longer a heartbeat. There was no more planing of a nursery, buying more baby items, or looking forward to another sonogram. It was all over. But today, as I remember how I am so blessed…I am beyond thankful. And there are days when it seems like too much. The days that I wonder if I am really cut out for this calling. But it is during those times that I pray and The Lord gives me strength. It is during those early wakenings, and ten thousandth diaper change that I am reminded what a miracle my son is. Thank you Lord for giving him to me and thank you for making me a mama.